It has been a while that I wrote something here, because something sad happened in my life, which I didn’t wanted to write about it because I didn’t know how it will end. But now that it is over I am still alive, I am glad you can read this right now.
Some of you maybe can remember that I crashed very hard on my head twice in the last two years, and after my second crash I had to make a MRT to see more exactly why the blood spot, (which was at the first time diagnosed as brain bleedings after an impact) looks like the same the year before. It came out, I have a Kavernom (a benign, arteriovenous abnormity of my brain) in my brain. (I didn’t have it from the crashes. It just came someday and was an incidental finding. So I was even more lucky that I crashed twice so that the doctors found it)
The doctor told me it’s not something very bad, but it can get bad, means that I have a neurological disability or even the blood spot breaks, and I could die in the worst case. Nobody could tell me if it ever will brake. So I decided to let it taken out.
It was very nerve racking time, because the surgery was planned in October, but I had to do special special MRT examinations. And I started to hate them. It took about 5x 1-2 hours in this very small, loud MRT scanner, and because it’s something new the scientists were happy to have a guinea pig. (All the patients before were not able to do this scans.) So I had to do it again and again and again , and it took longer that expected, and I got more and more frustrated… I wanted to have it done. In the end this functional MRT scans paid off. The doctor knew exactly were to enter without damaging my brain, and on the 23 of January I woke up fine. No brain damage, no disabilities…
I am soooooo happy now I can’t tell you. I had many injuries, crashes, operations but this was not comparable to anything I have done so far. Every jump, double, gap, drop what ever was not as frightening as this moment when you fall a sleep on the operating table, and you don’t know if you will wake up again.
I recovered very quickly, could leave the hospital quick and have nearly no headache anymore. I haven’t started to train yet because I have to wait 6 weeks. But I have time and will take it easy.
I say thanks to my lovely boyfriend, Cri who stayed with me every hour in hospital. Massive thanks to doctor Thomas Dobner. Big thanks to my parents and friends (Miriam, Markus, Petra, Birgit, Kathi, Claudia, Kodi, Lisa, Freda, Alexandra) who were there for me.
What I will do this year? I am not 100% sure now I have many things in my mind. But I know for 100% ride my bike as much as I can , competing at few Events, videoprojects and spent time with my boyfriend and friends/family and being productive.
I will keep you up to date now again more regularly.
Bye bye Helene
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Happy to be back home. |
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happy kodi that I am back |